ship-jumper's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Close to being in Jail It is flipin' cold here today. I don't feel like checking on the temperature, yet I do know it's cold enough to see my breath with each exhalation. Ha! To all those people that took all of their camp gear out of storage and dusted off the cobwebs prior to loading it all in their car.....only to drive and drive and arrive at their postage stamp plot of land for the weekend and unload everything in hopes of a hot, fun few days of lazing around a campfire.....HA!! They be freezing their ta-ta's and jing-jing's off right about now. I do recall hearing them forecast lows tonight around 35 degrees. Hope they all have a ton of liquor in their systems to keep them warm in their tents tonight because the warmth of those blazing fires isn't going to do diddly-do for them once they zip up for the night. Actually, I am one that loves camping. I love the packing-unpacking-packing-unpacking tango one does in this "sport." In an odd way I think I'm somewhat glad it's a cruddy weekend only because we weren't able to go ourselves. There is something divine about just hanging in the woods, by a lake, with nothing around you but campfires and trees. And the food? Yum! I don't care what it is, if you put it on a campfire it tastes TEN times better! Sigh. There are plenty of weekends ahead for that fun and bliss. I'll wait until it warms up and have the luxury of flies and mosquitoes to join the group! (yes! now THAT sounds like fun, no?) Lastly, I had, and still have, the incredible urge to risk being put in jail by stringing a rope around a dudes neck and throwing him off an 11th floor balcony to dangle in fear and panic. Yes. If I could do it and get away with it I would in a heart beat. While no longer religious and following doctrines or tenants, I still believe strongly that punishments should fit the crimes. Do unto others as you would have done to you. Kel and I took the dogs out this morning and were in front of the building. I heard this bone chilling howl of a cat from up above and glanced up nonchalantly to be horrified at what I saw. There was this black cat dangling from one of the iron rails of a balcony on the 11th floor and swaying in the wind while in a panic trying to claw its way back up a concrete wall! It was awful! A couple from the unit below came out to find this cat swinging in front of them but there was no way in hell they could reach it. The female was screaming trying to gain attention of the idiot who lived in the apartment above. Kel ran into the building to go and knock the door down and tell the asshole to go rescue his cat. The dude in the apartment below just stood on his balcony with his hands in the air in case the cats collar broke loose to cause the cat to hopefully plummet into his arms. Me? I sat there with my jaw to the pavement in horror with a ten pound and 90 pound dog begging to go to the bathroom. Happily, all ended well. I saw the asshole come out of his apartment and like a bloody fisherman reach over the balcony and pull his cat up to him via the leash. UNBELIEVABLE! What IDIOT a) puts his cat out on the balcony of a high rise, b) ties a leash from the balcony ledge to his cat????? I'll tell you who. An asshole who lives in our building who must ALSO be totally deaf as well as stupid as he didn't hear the awful howling that this poor cat was pumping out. There is NO reason I can come up with that this guy could supply that would satisfy me. I mean if you are so afraid your cat is going to jump off the balcony, then don't leave him alone out there in the first place! And certainly don't tie him up so he can clothesline himself! His punishment? Like I said. If allowed to carry it out I already have the rope and am more than willing to tie it around his neck and then I'll throw him over. Make him squirm and howl for 5 minutes and then I'll real him in like a big old fish in the arctic. There are a lot of people out there who just should NOT have pets! The lights dim. The curtain starts to be pulled and Shippie graciously steps off of her soap box. 3:29 p.m. - 2008-05-18 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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